Random thoughts and questions!

Hello everyone! I have been so busy that I have been lagging on writing on my blog, but I have a lot of things going on that I would like to hear from my fellow bandsters to see if it is normal and also since I am documenting my journey, so that others can see what I'm going through and may be of help if they experience the same. As of Today my 5 week anniversary I am down 26 lbs!!!

First off, I don't know the meaning of full. I have not PB'd or anything, but I just can't seem to get to the point where I can tell if I am full or not. I have always been a super fast eater. When you are only given 30 minutes of lunch and half the time I used to go out to get something and come back and eat at my desk it makes old habits hard to die. So, I have been trying to pace myself with the eating and there are times that when I eat I feel like I may have swallowed wrong or maybe just went down too fast and captured air. I feel like I am full and then I start burping. I could continue eating, but then I feel like wait, maybe if I keep going I am going to over do it, so I stop. I am eating about a cup of food. I want to make sure that I am only eating 1 cup of food and no snacks, but honestly by the time my next meal is here I'm hungry, no I'm starving!! I can't eat more than a cup of food at a time though, so I would not think I need a fill, unless I am wrong?

Exercise!!!! I'm starting to do that a little more, but I'm no where near where I should. I have all the equipment to do it, but I just don't know what to do! I know I could easily go to the gym and get a personal trainer, but I have it all at home, I just need orientation. I want to make sure that I am working out for my body! I need to lose more weight before my Cancun vacation this July. I want to make sure that if I am not bikini ready, that my Tankini is only the ini part minus the TANK!!!

I don't know if anyone else has gone through this, but seems like food is a bore to me..I don't seem to savor my foods the same as I did before. i know they are good and I enjoy them, but not like before for some reason. I think I now may be eating to live, not living to eat! lol..

any info will greatly be appreciated!

First Fill!!!

So I had my first fill today. I was a bit nervous as I really didn't know what to expect. I get to the my Dr's office and he is explaining to me what he will be doing. Then he starts preparing everything to do the fill. All of a sudden my hands started getting really sweaty after I see the 5" needle he starts preparing. He then says "Don't worry about the needle" so I take a deep breath and he makes me stand for the procedure. My hubby was with me but I think he had wider eyes than me and turned away. I didn't want to look either. As he started poking it wasn't that bad, but I guess he was not able to find the access right away so he poked around. He mentioned that I had quite a bit of scar tissue around the port. I finally told him I was feeling some pain, so he asked me to lay down and find the port that way.

He finds the port and inserts 4cc's. He made me drink a couple sips of water and it came right back up! It was way too tight. He then proceeds to poke me again this time it was so bad to remove the saline and I ended up with 1cc. I was kinda disappointed that I only had a 1cc fill, but he told met that everyone was different and that really didn't mean that it was a bad thing. He said I was doing so well that I should have no problems with losing more weight. I'm feeling a bit tired. I wonder if that is just the time change or this fill.

I was getting ready to make my fish tacos that I love and had been craving for weeks. I now go back to 2 days of liquids, 2 days of mushies and then on to my solid foods. All for the sake of being skinny!!! lol! and the journey continues....

Let's get this Lap band to work for Summer!!!!

I'm so excited, we just booked our summer trip. We are going back to Cancun! I Lo-lo-love that place! Now I really need to get on the ball and work harder, so I look good on the beach! I have 4 months to work at it what a great motivation. The picture I posted was from my 2008 trip, I'm hoping this years picture is going to have a skinnier me!

I think I'm now ready for a fill. I can eat more that a cup of food! I have been trying to still make good choices and limit my intake, but then I get hungry in a couple hours. Not good. The good thing is that I have my next Dr's appt on Wednesday, so I can hopefully get a fill.

All else has been well. I just can't seem to find the motivation to get myself up and workout! Hopefully now with the time change it helps me. I have Cancun to look forward to so that should motivate my butt up! LOL.....

20 lbs lose picture (face shot)

working on the body shot

I Hit 20 LBS!!!!!

So I have started my mushie stage! I am so excited to have reached this stage. I was so tired of of the liquids. I went grocery shopping and I stocked up on the allowable stuff. I'm enjoying this a bit more. I just seem to be running out of ideas to cook...I need to research a little more...any ideas, please send my way!

I Finally hit my 20 lbs over the weekend. I haven't lost 20 lbs in about 4 years. It's actually 21, but It sure hit that milestone and it feels GREAT! Although I keep saying most of it came from my big toe and my ears I'm so glad they are gone!!! My clothes all fit the same, some minor changes in the way they fit, but I'm still the same size.

I had a birthday party to go to and was able to eat grilled chicken, beans, salsa and guacamole from their variety of foods and that made me feel like I was not missing out on anything. It was quite nice!

I'm looking forward to starting my Zumba videos this week to give me a little boost and alternating with weights so that I can tone as well. I tried to clean up my garage again this weekend and boy was that alone a workout! I feel like I'm mining through all the crap in there to get to the machines...lol!

Back to work!

Yesterday was my first day back to work. It was exciting to come back and see my friends here. I have lost a total of 19 lbs now, so it's nice to see when others see the loss as I cannot really tell. I thought it would be really hard because of having to intake only liquids, while everyone else eats real food but it was not that bad. I think the only bad part was having to sit for such a long time. My port area was hurting a bit from that, but I would get up periodically to relax my stomach a bit. By the end of the day I was feeling the exhaustion though...I did come home and lay on the bed for a while!

I have also been getting myself on the treadmill everyday for about 30min to get myself moving. I just plug in my Ipod and on I go. I'm getting ready to have my sister and my cousin come over as workout buddies for extra motivation. I have my 2 week post-op appt tomorrow. I can't wait to at least jump into the smushie stage! I'm so done with my protein shakes.